to pick a pair of jeans

                                                             

                                                        
My mom likes to shop, she loves to buy her girls new clothes to dress us up with. But if there's something she really, really doesn't like to shop for with me... it's jeans! I am all about comfort and what fits right. Jeans I find, never fit in the right proportions, so I had a tendency to just ... give up and jump into a pair of my favorite sweats. Why buy something that doesn't fit right? Something I don't like and one use later be in a bag headed to the Salvation Army. It's not worth it! Maybe once a year .. probably even less I find a pair that I really like and since I'm not growing anymore I wear those until they get too worn out to wear to nice events, then the whole search process starts again! (ugh!)

But! There is hope! Once I put on a pair I like, I know right away that they are the ones (and usually they were the exact same thing I got last time! I recently noticed this b.c I save the tags to old ones =] )  My process for making decisions I know is not the norm in today's consumer society. I search, try some on, search some more, and then search some morreeee until the right ones come along. The same thing happened when I turned 13. My parents told me they would give me a purity ring, but they wanted me to pick it out, so it is exactly. what. I. want. (Boy do they know me well or what?!)  Let me tell you, like my jeans the process was long, and irritating, at times I wanted to settle for something less. There are a lot of pretty rings and I probably looked at them all  ;) but somewhere in my heart I knew they weren't for me. Like a puzzle there are some pieces out there that look the shape, but don't quite fit, or don't match the background. So you go in search for another piece. The minute I found my ring it was like I knew all along it was the one, the pieces clicked! The waiting, the decision making, the impatiences, it was all over and oh so very worth it. To this day - nearly 4 years later I still wear that ring until the moment comes where my life long perfect match puzzle piece proposes and we are married.

wondering about wandering...

You may be wondering about the title of my blog. To many, it probably looks like a bunch of random letters but I assure you that like most unusual things, there is a story behind it. But first and foremost let me introduce myself you to:

My name is HeartSounds and like my blog title there is a story behind my name as well. I've been playing the piano for about as far back as my first memory. I've learned a lot about notes, music theory, chords etc. but the notes themselves are not what make the music beautiful.. A song without the transfer of emotion from one heart to another is robotic, impersonal and meaningless. When one can share their happiness, love, or sorrow, through sound, that is music at its best.

For six years I was homeschooled with my sister by our mom, but when I got to the eighth grade I wanted something new, so I decided to give highschool a shot. Talk about culture shock! Quickly I found out I didn't have much in common with the majority of kids my age, also that highschool is nothing like the movies. Your every day was scheduled down to the last minute and I felt trapped, and many of the students didn't want to be there or learn at all, where as I wanted to! So I looked for alternatives and found out about Duel Enrollment with a near by college. So technically I am a junior in highschool but I don't have to go there anymore! I go to college full time and it is the best decision I've made.

This new semester I was learning about the theories of our solar system over the past hundreds of years in an Earth Systems Science course. My teacher mentioned the term " πλάνητες ἀστέρες " - planetēs astérēs - meaning wandering stars in Greek. The term was created due to confusion looking up into the heavens wayyy back in Ptolemy's time and the realization that some stars would randomly move and seem to have no rhyme or reason to it. Later years we learn it is the retrograde of the planets moving around the sun at different speeds in different orbits. But I thought the term "planetēs astérēs" was an interesting parallel to my life. Although I am one in many, like a star, I still have the potential to shine and be different, to wander through life "aimlessly" or "without pattern" in the here and now, yet in the bigger picture, God has a plan through everything I go through and in each part or the "sky of life" I travel through.